My daughter, Huh, recently showed me a writing assignment from her Senior English class.  They are supposed to write a letter to the new sophomore class giving them advice on being in high school.  Even though the seniors are only two years older, the teacher says she is sure they have accumulated some wisdom in the two years they have been in high school and that the sophomores could benefit from what they have learned.  The assignment made me wonder what the rest of the kids in my family would advise those who are two years younger.  I asked.  Here are their answers:

SQUID(Freshman in college advising high school juniors–his sister Juju’s class) – “PARTY!  No.  Actually I would advise them to enjoy life.  Live life out loud.  Live every moment and know that this is the time of your life.  Realize that life is short, it is just a second in the great abyss of time.”  After that last statement the rest of the kids rolled their eyes because Squid was getting dramatic.  He continued, “Always get salads during lunch.  The rest of school lunch is gross.  It makes me sick.  AND (dramatic pause) during your senior year take time to stop and take in the school environment.  Inhale the ‘Mackiness’ of the school.”  At this point Squid waxed poetic about what “Mackiness” meant in a good-natured jab at his step sister, Mack, who was sitting next to him.

I didn’t write all the “Mackiness” comments but continued to take notes when Squid moved on.  He grabbed the milk jug out of the fridge and gestured with it dramatically as he said, “Since you are now on top of the game you are no longer a sophomore speed bump.  You will climb mountains.  When you were a sophomore you couldn’t see the junior or senior mountains because your sophomore mountain hid it.  It will be the same with the junior mountain.”  This is when Hub started making gagging noises.  Squid just laughed and continued with a bunch of stuff about mountains and climbing them.  On my paper I just wrote, “blah, blah, blah.”

“To conclude my story,” Squid looked around to make sure we were all listening then held the milk jug aloft and said, “until you have graduated, life sucks.  Turn Emo.”  Then he took a swig straight from the milk jug.

None of the other kids got quite as dramatic as Squid.

Huh (Senior advising this year’s Sophomores–her sister Mack’s class) – “Number one, be honest.  Number two, being with your friends all the time isn’t that important.  Number three, when you have a headache or aren’t feeling well at school never take medicine meant for someone else.”

Juju(Junior advising 9th graders–her brother Shroom’s class) – “You are too young for steady relationships.  You are still the speed bump.  Don’t think you are all that great.” 

Mack(Sophomore advising 8th graders–her sister Hoob’s class) – “Be grateful you live in America because in the U.K. gas is sixteen dollars a gallon.”

Huh?  Sigh.  Sophomores.  I guess the Senior English teacher is right, they do need advice.

Shroom (9th grader advising 7th graders–9th graders in our area are still in Middle School) – “Listen to the 9th graders.  Don’t try to act cooler than people older than you.”

Hoob (8th grader advising 6th graders–In our area 6th graders are still in elementary school) – “Beware of Middle school!  Don’t procrastinate.  Get all your work in on time.  Be prepared.  Have fun.”

I thought for sure she would tell them to enjoy their last year of recesses but she never mentioned it.

Yawlin(3rd grader advising 1st graders) – “First grade is fun.  Like your teacher.  Don’t eat the cheese quesadillas at lunch because they are gross.”

So there you have it.  Wisdom?  Maybe there is a person or two who could benefit from this post.  Maybe not.  We certainly had fun hearing the answers.  Maybe I’ll check with each of them in two years and see what their answers are then.

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