“Notice my socks.”  Grandpa stuck out his right foot so I could see that his sock had been cut down to the ankle.  “I did that so I can scratch my leg better.”   Only one leg itched, so only one sock had been cut down.

The quirky sock comment is one of the main things that sticks out in my mind about my visit with my 86 year old grandfather in January.  The other thing that I remember most about that visit is how lonely Grandpa seemed to feel.  Grandma died 2 1/2 years ago after suffering from Alzheimer’s Disease for a few years.  Though he tries to go about his daily life by doing such things as working in his yard or visiting with family, Grandpa seems as though he’s only going through the motions.  He said several times during our visit how much he misses Grandma.

For Christmas I decided to give Grandpa the gift of time–my time.  I bought him a game of Skip-Bo, wrapped it up, and taped a note to the top of the package stating that I would be visiting him once a month to play games with him.  When he talked to my mom a little later about the gift I had given him he said, “She doesn’t have to do that.  And besides, I don’t know any games to play.”  But that is just Grandpa.  He doesn’t want to be a bother.

The first time I visited in January we never got around to playing any games.  He just talked.  And I listened.  I nodded.  I smiled.  Not only did I hear about his socks and how much he missed Grandma, I also heard the schedule of the t.v. shows he watches, how his dog, Nikita, protects him, and how he is sure he comes from Tower of Babel times, because he can no longer understand what people are saying in church (said with a wink and a chuckle).  I enjoyed the visit and left feeling excited for February’s visit.

In February I took advantage of the President’s Day holiday and took my kids with me since there was no school.  I want the four of them to connect with their “Grandpa Great.”  We pulled the kitchen table out and placed Uno Attack on it.  Grandpa eyed the game warily and asked, “What is that?  I’ve never seen that before.”

“It’s a game, Grandpa.  You’ll learn it.”

The first time the game spit a bunch of cards out Grandpa laughed hard.  When he caught on that it would happen randomly throughout the game he sat forward and watched intently whenever one of us had to press the button.  We played several hands, Grandpa playfully accusing anyone that won a hand of cheating.  “Hoob”, who was sitting next to Grandpa, got into the act and started dishing him out Draw cards whenever she got the chance.  Grandpa had a good time retaliating.  “Huh” had brought along her guy pal, “Brass.”  At one point in the game Grandpa looked at “Brass” and asked what was wrong with him since “Brass” couldn’t seem to win a hand.

Unfortunately, “Brass” had to be home early, so we were only able to play the game with Grandpa for an hour.  As we were walking out the door the kids all commented that they had had fun.  “Mack” even asked me a few days later when we could do it again.

Yesterday “Yawlin” got out of school early so I took him with me for the March visit.  This time we brought the game Sorry.  Again, Grandpa looked at the game warily and asked, “What is that?”

And again the answer, “It’s a game, Grandpa.  You’ll learn.”

My second cousin “A”, who lives in the back portion of Grandpa’s house, was there when we arrived so we invited him to play.  Grandpa quickly replaced the batteries in his hearing aids so that he could hear us better and we began the game.  “Yawlin” was quick to give Grandpa pointers and moved Grandpa’s pawns for him whenever they were too far away for Grandpa to reach.  “A” ended up winning the game.  But, since it had ended sooner than any of us wanted, we continued to play to see who would come in second.  “Yawlin” got that honor. 

Grandpa and I looked at each other and in unison said, “Who gets third?”  The game continued. 

Now “A” and “Yawlin” were totally against me and rooting for Grandpa to win.  It came down to both of us needing a One card to get our final pawn into Home.  Back and forth we went drawing cards, the boys cheering whenever I drew a card that I couldn’t use and groaning when Grandpa did the same.  When Grandpa finally drew the coveted One card the boys were ecstatic.  And so was Grandpa.  He thanked me several times for coming.

My Mom told me that whenever she tells Grandpa I’m on my way he always says, “She doesn’t have to come all year long.”  But then Mom says, “I think he secretly likes it.”  I do too.

I thanked “Yawlin” for coming with me yesterday.  He grinned and told me he’d had fun.  I think there might be a connection forming between “Yawlin” and Grandpa Great.  I look forward to the April visit.  Maybe we’ll be able to play the Skip-Bo game that I originally bought when I decided to give time to Grandpa.

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